WAIT DONT TELL ME YOU MADE OWL NOISES! OMG YOU ARE SCREWED. Listen, you need to hide yo kids and hide yo wife now! NOW! Then follow these steps
1. Buy a shotgun online. Wait till it is delievered to your door. Never leave the house until you get your shotgun.
2. Always wear a cup. The owls have studied us and now know our weakness.
3. You need to threaten the owls. Maybe kill the leader's brother or something.
4. If they dont leave after the threat, then you need to pick them off one by one. Do this by making owl sounds and lead them to your basement. Then at that point, have all your children tie down the owl and you can interrogate him. Get all the information about his clan as possible. The human race depends on this information.
5. The captured owl's friends will now compromise if you let the owl go.
Tadah... owls gone
Humans 1 Owls 0
I first want to state that IT IS A FEDERAL CRIME TO KILL ANY BIRD OF PREY. This is punishable by up to 5 years in prison and a $200,000 fine. If you have a predatory bird that you cannot protect against, your local Wildlife Division may be able to assist you in removing the bird. Occasionally you can get a depredation permit to shoot a bird of prey if they have caused significant loss of property. I urge and encourage you to use this as an absolute last option.
I am not going to go into too much detail about identifying the raptors, because there are many different species, and some of them are geographically isolated.
Duck and cover
Drop and roll
Whatever it takes.
Happened one time to me! Huge bird. White At least 3 ft. wing span. Co worker thought I was a goner. I tried the stand off..wondering. it did not changed directions. I dropped down running for cover. Quite amazing that one was. I don't wait for them to get that close anymore
I came back from a swim tonight and got swooped by an owl. By the look on his face he was seeing if I would run. Maybe it was the billion head tilts IDK. Now 3 of them are around my house making noises. I should probably admit I have been making owl noises at them for a month. I have only seen the 3 times. Tonight was the 4th. And instead of 2 there are 3. Please help?
